Sahiti’s POV
“Sahiti! Wake up! It’s 6 a.m.!”
“Mmm… Amma, why so early? Let me sleep for a few more minutes,” I groaned, burying my head under the pillow.
“Come on, get up! We need to go take Sri balaji Devudu(god) darshan.”
“Uggghhh… wait, wait, I’ll wake up,” I muttered, dragging myself out of bed.
Sometimes, I honestly don’t understand why my parents are so conservative about everything. If my left eye flickers, Amma assumes something bad is going to happen to the family. Nana never lets me wear black clothes at night. Cutting nails on Tuesdays and Fridays? Forbidden. Why? Don’t ask me—these rules are older than me, and no one dares question them.
I yawned my way into the washroom, splashing my face with cold water to wake myself up. I did my brushing and then my thalant snaan(head bath) and Today, I had a plan. I was going to tell my parents about my acceptance letter from the college. But deep inside, I wondered… did my parents really want me to be independent and live on my own? And study and live my life atleast peacefully before getting married Or was it only because Dev, my fiancé, was already there that they agreed? I wanted to believe their intentions were good, but a tiny doubt always lingered.
Still, I couldn’t deny my excitement for the course. I was forced to love mathematics since childhood—blame my father for that. He was once a mathematics teacher in a small municipal school before writing govt entrance and becoming a government officer. He used to tell me that education and women’s independence were the most important things a society could offer. He’d speak about women who broke barriers, making a mark in fields dominated by men. He always said, “One day, Sahiti, I want you to become a genius mathematician like Shakuntala Devi. Show the world that women can be unstoppable.” Be a good woman, a good character for the society, for the family but dont become like your sister.
But then there’s my sister… Suhani.
For my parents, she’s as good as dead.
strived alot for the family since 16, working as a tution teacher when we weren't financially doing good, dad worked day and night studying for govt exams while simultaneously teaching in school, while I was still a kid happy but left alone as everyone else were busy making ends meet until my dad bagged a very good government job but still a decent paycheck. Atleast pension mattered alot.
Okay, she's Kind, Goddess types, beautiful, strong, independent, family oriented
she is very well settled, academically, careerwise, a proper, central uni engineer,a nd a top MBA graduate with 9.5 cgpa and bagged her job at Deusch Bank
This is what a pakka south indian person should be right?? proper resume, proper code of conduct with proper decency, being naive and a lot more sanskari and being a proper person for the society, but the only thing that they lacked was, worrying for what they wanted for themselves.
and jiju taught her that, hai toh punjabi naa
but jiju brought sweet danger, adventure and spice to life, a longing for her to live for herself, to love herself, to risk life and live free, to be wild,
kyunki zindagi toh ek hi hai naa( you only live once, live it to the fullest)
he taught her, he is a literal green land, green forest!!
she got married with her colleague and love of her life, but in terms of marriage?
complete failure for my parents as jiju was punjabi, is non-vegetarian, also promised that after marriage he would quit it for her and the family, but one thing that was pending, VAASTU DOSH. but still they had a great compatibility and they are still in love like lovesick teenagers . looking at them staring at their eyes it feels like love at first sight!!
for me i always saw her being loved by her punjabi jiju.
i wish i could get such but nevermind!, its afterall fate right??
for me, she’s still my sister. She secretly messages me on Instagram, we FaceTalk occasionally. She’s happily married now, and she still cares for me in her own quiet way. She’s the one who suggested I study differential mathematics and geometry—they’d help me in the long run, she said. And she was right. I'm starting to love it. Absolutely.
After another quick thalantu snaanam (head bath), as I didn't had time like the other days rubbing my nipples and moving my hands in between my thighs, I quickly came out saw myself naked for few seconds and got dressed in a half-saree, pinning jasmine gajras into my hair, leaving it half-open. My anklets chimed with every step as I walked out of my room. Kohl-lined eyes which would make every guy in the neighborhood make himself presentable to be mine , red-tinted lips which i only give that right only to the love of my life the only one whom I might give my virginity to, my future husband… but not dev okay!!
After getting ready i gave a French kiss to myself looking at the mirror and admiring myself as long as i don't get my pasandida mard to admire me
i walked out of my room with full filled main character energy, diva song being played in my mind, as i came twirling my long locks and walking down, my anklets chiming with the sound as i called out my mom
“Amma—”
“How much time will you take, girl!” Amma’s voice was sharp but playful. “Staring at the mirror for too long isn’t a good sign. At this rate, you might even miss the muhurtam of your own wedding!”
Nana chuckled. “Kalavathy, leave her be. She’s still young. She’ll understand with time that it’s precious. Let’s go—the car is waiting.”
I slid into the backseat while Nana drove us to the temple. We waited in the long line for darshan. The air was heavy with the smell of incense, the sound of bells, and priests chanting mantras. Normally, I’d get bored. But today felt different. Maybe it was because I was about to leave the country. Maybe it was because, for the first time, I’d be truly alone. I was going to be a person to be independent, to earn and make myself and my family proud
Standing before Sri Balaji Devudu, I prayed silently—not just for success, but for strength. “Be with me, in the best times and the worst,” I thought. I didn’t know what awaited me in Britain, but I had this strange feeling in my chest… as if something big was coming.
We reached home an hour later. My parents sat on the big wooden swing, talking softly and sipping filter coffee. I stood near the pillar, twisting the end of my saree nervously.
“Amma, Nana…”
“Yes, kanna?” Nana looked up.
I look down playing with my half saree pallu that i haven't changed yet, excitement ithi thi ki rukhi hi nahi gayii
(I was so excited that i couldn't even stop myself to wait for even once)
Ummm nanna i...i umm...
Tell me kanna don't hesitate. My dad asked gently.
I look up to my parents with my doe eyes mode on and spoke softly nervously,
“I wanted to talk to you both about something.
I… I’ve been admitted into the London Mathematical Institute. The course starts in two weeks. And as I have a merit score the tution fees and my other expenses are waived off”.
For a moment, silence. The steel thaali slipped from Amma’s hands. Nana’s eyes widened, then softened. He stood, walked over, and patted my back with so much pride that my eyes stung.
“Oh my god, Kalavathy! Isn’t this wonderful news? My daughter has done it!” he said, tears brimming in his eyes. “You’ve made me proud, kanna.” I bent down, touching their feet for blessings.
“Kalavathy!” Nana beamed. “Call Chitti, Atha, Mammayya… everyone. The day after tomorrow, we’ll have a grand celebration at ITC Chennai. My genius mathematician deserves nothing less. Make your Amma and all the women proud, kanna!”
I smiled, heart warm but mind racing. I began telling them more about the course, the professors, the city. That’s when Nana suddenly said, “Let me call Dev. He should hear this from me.”
I froze for a second. What would Dev think? Would he be happy? Or would he feel strange that his fiancée was still going to college? But before I could object, Nana handed me the phone.
“Uh… hi,” Dev’s voice came through, a little nervous. “I just heard the news. Congratulations, my future wifey. I’m so happy for you.”
“Thanks, Dev,” I replied softly.
“Don’t thank me. You’re my future wife—it’s my right to take care of you. And since your admission is in Britain… well, I already stay there with my friend Zane. There’s a small apartment, and you can stay there. You’ll have your own space, but Zane can assist you if you need anything. I’ve already spoken to him.”
“That’s… very thoughtful. Thanks, Dev.”
“Again with the thanks,” he teased lightly. “By the way, are you excited?”
“Yes, of course. I’m thrilled to finally be studying maths there. And I’ve always wanted to try chocolate-covered strawberries from London.”
Dev laughed. “You can find those in the London market. Zane will take you. But… that’s not the excitement I was talking about.”
I blinked. “Then what do you mean?”
“I meant… aren’t you excited that we’re going to get married next year?” His voice had a softness, a hopefulness.
I forced a small smile he couldn’t see over the phone. “Yes, Dev. Absolutely. I just… want to finish my studies and get a job first. That’s all I ask.”
Truth? I never really wanted to get married so soon. But Dev… he’s a good man. The kind most girls would be lucky to have. He talks about our future, about us as husband and wife, painting small romantic moments in words. I should feel the same, right? I should be happy my parents found me someone like him.
Was I happy? Yes.
From the bottom of my heart?
That… I’ll only know later, in the story the Almighty has already written for me.
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